No Picture Friday=Aprilness:

Sorry guys. No pictures today. Just the 'talky talky' stuff.

1) We're having a gar(b)age sale again tomorrow. Our second ever.

This sale is for the purpose of being able to afford groceries and gas in the car this coming week.

If you think I'm kidding?

So. Not. Kidding.

2) Don't feel sorry for us.

Feel sorry for ME. I go to work each and every day. Broken-assed foot? Went to work. Beautiful sunny day outside? Went to work. Back out of whack? Went to frigg'n work. Each and every single day you will find my nose pressed firmly to the grindstone.

3) At some point in the last two weeks, my vocal chords separated from my brain waves and I uttered the sentence "I'ma fish the next tournament." Out loud and everything! What the hell is wrong with me? a) I don't know how to fish. I don't think there has ever been a time where I've held a rod, let alone put the stringy end into a body of water. b) Fish creep me right the fuck out. I have a rule that everything I ingest cannot have a face, skin, fins, bones or crustaceous (sp?) parts still attached to it. c) This is seriously going to cut into my knitting and picture taking time. d) I'm smart and when I put my mind to something I have a pretty good success rate. e) None of these other MoFos can catch fish in our tournaments lately so I figure . . . why the hell not fish it? I have as good a chance as all these other no-fish-catchin-yahoos, don'tcha think?

4) knitting. Yep. Still do it. You 'member, 'member? How I'm knitting that *wine cozy* thing from my 2006 Lisa Souza yarn purchase? Holy crap that yarn is deeee eff'n licous. I'm knitting in the round and I don't think I want to stop. The color is a beautiful mix of green/teal/purple and the feel is just buttah under my fingers. When I started knitting with this yarn, I had picked up the smaller cake of it (it's some gargantuan yardage and my ball winder couldn't hold it all in one cake so I had to break off after balling up about 80% of it and create a smaller cake with the rest of it. The smaller one is what I started knitting up at first.) While I was knitting on the smaller cake, I had the brainiac idea to use the larger cake to whip up a(nother) My So Called Scarf. That So Called Scarf is currently a WIP off the larger cake and the Wine Cozy is past the smaller cake and now onto the outer end of the larger cake. The more I knit on that Wine Cozy (in the round) the more I want to frog the So Called Scarf side and make some dee eff'n licious socks with whatever is left. Seriously. This yarn is something special and something this special needs to be for just ME ME ME.

5) I still plan on hitting my "Very First Ever Sweater Cast On" deadline this month. It's even marked on my work calendar (where I notate when I have to calculate payroll taxes or sales tax or finish the 2007 financial statements for submission to the owner/accountant/bank).

6) One day I'll tell y'all why I cannot travel and visit The Yarn Harlot, David Reidy, Alaska, Buckingham Palace or even Prague. It's a tragic tale and must be told.

7) Blog stuff: I have an account with Bloglines (the place where I can spot check all the blogs I want to keep an eye on, and thankyouverymuchtoJollyeweforcluingmeintothisawesomeness!) and I check it . . . oh . . . about 1 bazillionty times a day. Right now (*right now* being when I updated it two hours ago) my unread blog entries clock in at 7,078. Ain't kidding you and I have a picture to prove it, lol. Here's the thing though. The blogs I actually scroll down, to look for updates? In their order are: boogaj, Carrieoke, PerezHilton (I know, I know, I KNOW! Y'all know I know better), The Chicken of Antioch (we all know that's 1/2 of the The Lime & Violet duo), Confessions of a Pioneer Woman, Crazy Aunt Purl, Domain Dephal, Jen is Not Crafty, Jollyewe knitting blog, Knit with Snot (for your pleasure), Knitting Blue (content, not color!). HOLY CRAP! That's me!, knittyBlog, Lime & Violet's Daily Chum, Rabbitch (honestly people? I want to grow up and be her. I used to want to grow up and be Jessica Savitch, but she went and died and had some controversy. Rabbitch has controversy while she's still alive and kicking. Rabbitch is an awesome blogger and that's all I have to say about that), Ravelry : news, Scout's swag (if you don't enjoy her monthly calendars, then I don't even know you. Her picture tak'n awesomeness is only surpassed by her yarn dy'n awesomeness. She radiates awesomeness), SundayUndies, Turtlegirl's Bloggy Thing, Yarn Harlot. Those that I didn't list here are picked up on ravelry. Dulcedosa, Ellen Bloom, StudioD, laurenswool, kadiddly. Thank you guys so much for putting your stuff out there for perusal. Can I just speak my mind and say that Jollyewe and Jen is Not Crafty and laurenswool do NOT blog enough? Blog people! If I miss your updates then there are at least 10 others that are missing you too. Just say'n.

8) After all this "Poor talk", y'all may be wondering how it is that I'm on Teh Intronets talking to you. It's a simple story, really. Somebody in my ghetto neighborhood has an unsecured internet connection. Thank Ye for that, Ghetto Neighborhood Denizen.

9) I could go on and on. No, really. Swear to gawd I could. Consider y'all saved from my verbal onslaught. You're welcome :tongue in cheek:

10) See #1. My ass has to be up and perky at First Light O'Clock tomorrow. While I'd normally respond with "Fuck That", this time I have to scarf down a serving of Humble Pie alongside my first cup of coffee tomorrow a.m. Don't bother wishing *me* luck for this foray. Put your hands together for The Hub and whomever lands on our driveway looking for a bargain at 7 a.m.

Did I mention that I'm not exactly a "people person" ??? Hard to believe, I know . . . .

11) Jollyewe. I'm sorry to hear that your mom has progressed to this point. I'm sorry for you and what you are experiencing. Always being The Strong One has a toll. Just say the word, Hon.

Jen is Not Crafty. Whatever you need. When we went down to B'field and back? One of my favorite times.